Wednesday, February 13, 2013

When it Comes to Dating, Time is Your Friend!

I feel confident saying that the majority of the world has lost the true and beneficial concepts of dating.  To be honest, my views of dating was seriously misconstrued until I started becoming more educated on the topic- and believe me, the ways of truly dating have made such a difference in my life.  Dating is a science that is crucial to understand, but quite easy to misinterpret. There are many reasons or functions of dating:  recreation, intimacy, companionship, finding a mate, status attainment, and socialization.  If we want to begin understanding we must first understand socialization.

Socialization (noun) :  "a continuing process whereby an individual acquires a personal identity and learns the norms, values, behavior, and social skills appropriate to his or her social position" (www.dictionary.com).

I also think it is important to understand the real meaning of dating.

Dating (noun) :  "A social appointment, engagement, or occasion arranged beforehand with another person" (www.dictionary.com).

How does one learn socialization?  We learn it best through the real meaning of dating!  Dating is meant to be a variety of activities with a variety of people.  By dating this way, and not becoming a permanent fixture upon another person, one can truly understand the importance of socialization vs. exclusively dating someone in which they know little about.  We can learn to understand with whom we "click" with better, understand who we are as an individual, find things we like about different people and use those things to help us understand who we are looking for as a spouse, our eternal companion!  Dating creates opportunities to really get to know somebody before considering themselves an "exclusive" couple.  Sure, it may seem weird or difficult to let the person you like go on dates with different people, but if it does not work out between the two of you, then you are saving yourself unnecessary heartache about a person whom (in the grand scheme of things) you do not know very well, and which it is probably a blessing that you two did not date exclusively.  On a side note, one of the most fascinating things I learned this week was that it takes at least three months to begin to get to know a person!  So why jump into an exclusive relationship so fast?  Why not get to know each other on a friend basis first?  By dating casually and without allowing physical touch to become an issue, you can truly get to know someone before you put your heart on the line.  Take the opportunities of socialization; get to know a variety of people in a variety of activities so that you can know exactly what you want in a spouse and save yourself heartache.  Time is on your side, so don't be so quick to claim a relationship as exclusive.  I promise the blessings from doing so outweigh the idea/hurt of not wanting the person you like going on dates with other people.

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